Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Celestina and a guide to kissing in Singapore!!

Kissing is fun.

But you’ve got to be careful: mess it up when you first kiss and the girl will probably never want to see you again. Get it right, however, and you’ll have a lifetime of lip-smacking fun ahead of you.

So to help you get it right, here’s the definitive guide to kissing in Singapore by the insatiable Celestina, a self-confessed “cam whore” and kissing expert.

Besides being a kissing expert, Celetina is also one of Singapore’s hottest models. She is sexy as hell. I particularly like the huge tattoo on her lower back. Sheer class.

Okay. First things first: personal hygiene. Kissing is an intimate activity and the girl doesn’t really want to know what your lunchtime noodles taste like. So brush your teeth well and use listermint. Tip: you can also buy little bottles of listermint that can fit into your pocket; perfect if you get lucky during the day on Orchard Road and don’t have time to go home and clean up!

Second is location. Some say you should never kiss in a crowded place for the first time. I don’t agree. The problem with Singapore is that hotels aren’t as cheap as they were a few years back. In fact it’s fucking crazy. Even Hotel 81 is expensive. No wonder Singapore is now the 10th most expensive city in the world. So why not give a “public performance”? Don’t be afraid. This isn’t Malaysia is it?

It’s expensive to stay in hotels, but the view from (behind) the window is nice.

Now the act itself. Do NOT jump on her throat and start kissing her like a savage! Keep yourself in your pants!! You may be hungry for the love juice and dying to get inside her, but self-controlled kissing is the way to impress her.

A little cuddle before the kissing begins.

The first kiss on the cheek. Nice: playful yet controlled. Celestina is a smooth operator.

Now it gets serious. I find the girl often goes crazy if you breath deeply on her neck. Make sure you bend your head the other way than the girl's. This will give you the freedom to keep the touch at maximum level. Massage and stoke her thighs. And now the lips should touch…

Tip: close your eyes during your first kiss. If you kiss with your eyes open, the girl might think that there are other things on your mind (like football) which are more important than kissing her! And you don't want her to assume that do you?!!

Now take it to the next level. Explore her mouth with your tongue, but do NOT suffocate them. They have not got gills like fish and still need to breathe!

Celestina and friend French kiss (also called tongue kissing, making-out, sucking face, swapping spit, deep kissing, getting off with, pulling, slug wrestling, tonsil tennis, tonsil ping-pong, and tonsil hockey).

And remember: after making out, it’s nice to have a cigarette…

So that’s it. I hope you find this guide to kissing in Singapore useful. And for more on Celestina, make sure to check out her fantastic blog here!


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